Falling in love with the present moment

When do you dance to a song? When it is playing, or when it is finished? What if life is supposed to be like music and you should dance while it’s playing. If 1st grade is only a preparation to 2nd grade, school in general only  preparation of your career, and in a career you need to make quota’s to eventually provide for your old age, you will then realise at an old age that life was supposed to be danced on. Life is not a to do list that you can feel relieved from when its crossed away on the list.

Some people say life flies away before their eyes. Of course this is an illusion as time doesn’t exist.  What causes the illusion of time flying more rapid when we grow older?

Thousands of years ago, the mixture of two ancient gods from the old Greeks and the old Egyptians, Hermes Trismegistus, said the following: “He who doesn’t take the time to admire the beautiful flower next to the road will punished, he will find that the time will fly away. But he who still allows himself the beauty of existence will be rewarded with infinity.”

Time is an illusion made by the mind. There are circular movements in the present moment, if a time line would exist, it should be a time circle. A circle where everything is repeating. Life comes and slowly falls apart. Your current shape is now, in the future death is waiting for the shape that you identify with. Becoming present in the present moment is the way to get rid of the illusion of time, and thus becoming more aligned with our own being and allowing the void to come in our awareness.

Every thought about the future and the past is experienced in the now. There is no beginning nor an end to the moment of now. You have never been in the past, you have never been in the future. Nobody has ever been there. That is because it doesn’t exist. Even if you would go to the past, you would experience the past in the present moment. In the bible there is a part where god says: “I am the alpha and the omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.” But in the infinity of the present moment, there is no beginning, nor an end. Our mind cannot comprehend this. Life has always been. The big bang theory can easily fit in the circular movement from the present moment.

The eternal now has several qualities, its, peaceful,  full of acceptance, it is timeless, joyous, spacious, allowing, caring, non-judgemental, it has the touch of oneness, it brings satisfaction, gratification, grace, compassion, feeling pleasurable, delightful, and everything feels softly. All  together in a deep presence. Together these aspects might be called unconditional love. This is the kind of love that is at the building block of what we call life. It is like there was always an ocean inside of you, influenced by waves and storms and all of a sudden it is like the ocean is flat without a wrinkle.  I wonder why people don’t worship the now massively. If you cannot allow yourself to be in this state of being, you are missing out. Of course for the stressful mind this moment can rarely exist, and if it does, it’s merely an obstacle to overcome.

Search deep inside of yourself for your pain body. If you have addressed that, all it takes is one moment that makes you fall out of your habits. Our habits had the purpose of keeping you away from the pain body. After you have addressed most of it, you probably wouldn’t change right away. Habits are too strong for that to happen. But sometimes you will have a short moment where everything that you normally see looks weird. Maybe for a few seconds only, they become more and more and eventually you will fall into grace. It is not a special experience, it is so random that it’s easily overlooked and filled up with clouds of thoughts.

Maybe I had to lose touch with it, so that I would appreciate it even more once I am back, back at myself, whatever I might be. In the state of newness, your thoughts become more relaxed, as you realise the pointlessness of theories, desires, concepts and strategies for the future. Because you already have the result your mind wants in the future. In this way you are going beyond thoughts.

In order to seek these qualities in the non-existent frame of time, our mind has to come up with fakes. A fraud to produce a feeling of happiness. Of course they cannot even come close to the experience the now. But one can say people often talk about joy that they haven’t experienced. If a small glimpse of now shines through, the ego likes to claim the victory.

Some of the ego’s substitutions for now are; possession, rituals and accomplishments. The thing you once enjoyed will be your prison when you want to own it. A ritual can make you give a glimpse of the world beyond the mind, but by giving the ritual the power, you will become enslaved by the ritual. You would want to become someone in the world in the form of accomplishments, but every accomplishment, ritual or possession can only give you a short release of the mind’s cramped condition . If you don’t know the real of experience of joy, life will become small and petty. The mind will come up with projects like, marriage, getting children, getting the promotion, buying a new bathroom or kitchen, or escapism strategies like binge-watching, intellectual amusement, holidays, alcohol & drugs, and so on. Life will become shallow. It’s a trap like being caught in a maze without exits. You will find yourself in a brand new bathroom without enjoyment about it. You will find yourself on a beach without the ability to enjoy it. Maybe you will start making pictures to capture a moment you were never in at the first place. And if you still haven’t found what you were looking for after your mid-life crisis, you might become numb. The only way to escape the maze is to get into the moment, find out what you really are, the opposite of ratio. Become present and it will be like a two-dimensional body that was trying to escape the two-dimensional maze, will become a three-dimensional body and steps out of the maze without any effort.

Often when I tell people I  don’t think that much, they are projecting an experience of numbness on me. Numbness is a level under thoughts, if you’d like to compare it. Numbness can happen via alcohol, via repetitive rituals, etc. This is not at all what I am writing about. Numbness is the opposite. In this state of mind you will find yourself really aware, but in a relaxed way.  Sometimes with people who are not considered sane, people say he or she is not completely there. The state I am trying to describe is the opposite, you will be 100% there with your attention. In the past I had the tendency to drift off in a conversation, to compare, to project my own desires and so on in a conversation. I was trying to fill up the emptiness of the conversation with my own experiences. Now you will find me being 100% at the conversation. But strangely I find, there isn’t much to talk about. I am seeing the person. I can sometimes see that a conversation is uncomfortable for others, when I have nothing really to say. Yet I am peaceful and enjoying the meeting. I notice the uncomfortable situation inside them, on one side they feel like I have a certain presence that they are enjoying, yet on the other side they know the conversation has dropped dead. I find myself giving them compliments in these moment. “You have a really nice jacket.” “You look really healthy today.” I don’t know if this makes them feel any better, especially when they don’t know me at all. People usually give compliments as they want something from them, but I don’t want anything from them. Another funny thing for you to do, give compliments to strangers! Maybe this practise will help you to step out of your comfort zone.

Another practise, have a conversation with some people on the street, and know that whatever will happen, you will not fill in the blanks with your own experience. In this exercise it makes no sense to drift off into thoughts about things that you would like to tell them. Nowadays, when I observe conversations between people, I see there aren’t actually dialogues, but rather monologues. I recognise the urge to interrupt the other, to make your own point. If the other person doesn’t agree to their point they often feel offended. Try to make a habit of listening instead. Answer only to a question instead. If you don’t understand them yet, ask a deepening question. In this way it’s more likely for you to expend the comfort-zone of your own concepts. You will make it a habit into trying to understand the other person.

If you get emerged in the now, you will find yourself falling deeper and deeper into your own being. It’s a lovely process, what we were meant to do in a lifetime. Life doesn’t stop, it is merely the beginning. From that point on you are really playing the game. When you emerge into the now you will feel like you are being in love. Nobody can tell, yet you know everything changed. Do you still take time to admire birds, ducks or tree’s? Or has your mind succeeded in keeping you away from yourself and the moment of now?